ulster unionist

Screwing over the Ulster working class

“Alastair?- it’s Danny.

Hello Danny…Danny who?

DeBurgh! Templepatrick- Can you  speak?

Sure, there’s  patients waiting but I’ve always time for an Official Unionist.

Good man. Has all that unpleasantness gone away? That stuff with Hart and the PSNI?

Oh yes, complainants under the bridge!

Well the thing is that the jolly old stately home is a bit of a bind, bit of a thingy round the neck, if you know what I mean….what’s the word…raven?

Albatross, Danny

Oh yes and I was wondering if we might join forces to create a lobby firm.

Jesus, Danny, if the Prods of south Antrim hear about that you’ll never be re-elected!

Yes, well OK but I’m not getting any younger and the MP thing was a bit of a surprise to me as well as everyone else.

Well, kiss goodbye Danny, when Paul gets wind of this , you’re toast!

Yes, well back to the business in hand…you up for it?

Of course I am, you know me-and you have a third player, is that right?

Yes, decent chap, media wallah..

Lets go for it- just one thing, you have a lot of people in your constituency who lost loved ones during the Troubles, isn’t that right?

Yup

Sefton , pain in the ass, former barrister, campaigns about his dead parents and Libya?

Yup

What will he think- are you going to lobby for him?

Don’t be daft Alistair- this is business, as my Jewish friends say..

So what if he rings up, looking for help?

We’ll tell him that this is a high profile firm “able to engage at the highest levels on behalf of clients”

Like the Blues and Royals?

Precisely -No working class unionist muck here  old boy.

But wasn’t one of your friends killed?

Yes, of course but we superior chaps have learned to live with that. Fortunes of war and all that. Stiff upper lip and all that.

Sefton  says that his ancestors fought for the Crown since 1605.

Maybe but canon fodder old chap, Like your MLAs . Stupid campaign re Libya. Doesn’t he know that there are fortunes to be made in oil? My old man made a fortune in lemonade- imagine what you could make in oil.

OK count me in- I miss London and the grub.

Splendid, lets meet in the Guards Club, they let Ulster  Nationalists in now.

 

Whom to trust?

When I was a boy, long time ago now, I used to go for walks with my Dad on  a Sunday morning. One thing he said , which struck me was ‘note how many trade union leaders become Lords’.

This started me on the path of believing that  nothing is ever as it seems.

If I were the controller of MI5 I would seek to bring within my purview every renegade and rebel in the Kingdom. I would black mail them with their peccadilloes . Sex, money, drugs, terrorism [that should cover most Ulster politicians].

Which brings me to Willie Frazer.

I have tried to love Willie, God knows.

I have followed his talking head series.

I have watched him pop up in every conceivable point of tension in the Six Counties.

I have followed his dyslexic ramblings.

I have hoped for a successful  outcome to just one of the many causes that he has espoused.

Willie was of course identified by the High Court as an associate of loyalist terrorist organisations. See re F 2005 NI 280.

Why is it that he reminds me of the unionists of old who promised the stars and delivered nothing? Think of the recent documentary on the shooting of an entirely innocent man on the Shankill Road. Which unionist ever took up that case?

Let’s consider the killings at Kingsmills. Nothing that Willie has done over the last several years has produced one document to assist the families. Now, after threats to march in Dublin and reports that he was bought off, the initial hearing into the deaths has produced nothing.

The outcome for the families? Nothing.

The consequence for Willie? He continues to rampage about without any visible means of support.

Or perhaps I’m being too naive…….