DUP MP Jim Shannon represents a constituency with more than its fair share of victims of SF/IRA violence. His party paid scant attention to them in their recent election manifestos.

Fifty million pounds is going to be spent by the DUP along with their terrorist buddies in trying to pay off paramilitaries that should have gone years ago. That is on top of a similar amount spent over the last five years on victims’ organisations, like those associated with that bigot Willie Frazer.

I have lobbied Foster, Donaldson and Mrs Dodds in the past about the plight of victims and their legitimate expectations. All to no avail.

But Jim has a pressing issue. Funfairs. Yes, funfairs and amusement parks. He is concerned about their safety. Why has Jim such an interest?

Is Ards the funfair capital of Europe?

Was he once a clown in an amusement park?

Was he  once ejected from the wheel of death, on to his head? That’s possible I suppose.

Does he propose a DUP motion to ban funfairs because people are having too much fun?

He has learned that in 2014/2015, 489 members of the public reported injuries from these fun palaces. Soon the figures will rise and outstrip the 3,000 plus dead from the Troubles.

Jim believes that I should be shocked.

I am.

How did the people of Strangford get such a nitwit?